DAY 13 - DOCTOR APPOINTMENT

Today was a lot more stressful than I hoped for. I really didn't have a very good reaction to the doctor's office - just sitting in the lobby made me nervous, and it didn't help that they had this jazzy elevator music playing. It was not the least bit calming. I think they should redo their lobby, play peaceful music, lower the lights -- I tried to find a suggestion card, but couldn't - I guess they aren't looking for suggestions.

They probably don't want my suggestions anyway. I would have to add to it that the doctor is rude, inconsiderate, and totally obnoxious ... and that he needs to work on his empathy and people skills.

I asked him about checking the embryo quality - he said what I expected, every embryo that makes it this far we consider grade 1. But while he said this, he did something I didn't really expect ... and that was, he turned and responded to Thomas. Completely did not look at me. What he really had was a look on his face that said "Please talk some sense into this woman." I didn't know if Thomas would have really noticed, but I mentioned it when we left. He did notice - in fact, he said while the doctor was looking at him, he kept trying to glance at me hoping the doctor would get the message. .... SO ... They don't bother to actually look, they assume. Other clinics seem to grade these, look for problems, something. So I asked if I could get a photo of them. That is also a fairly common practice. So he said he might be able to do this. I'll probably have to remind them the day of my transfer.

And I also asked if maybe I would be a candidate for assisted hatching. He said that would be hard to do because they don't really do assisted hatching on 5-day-old embryos. I have no idea why. Clinics can check the thickness of the embryo shell and see if it is too thick to hatch on its own - but I guess that would require them to look at the embryo. And I checked some scientific studies, it can definitely be done.

So, overall, the doctor's appointment was much too stressful, and aggravating. They did check my hormones and the lining of my uterus. We have the all clear to proceed with transfer on Thursday.

I came home, laid down, slept, and I am attempting to destress.